Not Sure About My Wife’s New Habits

Tammy’s always had her little quirks which is part of what makes me love her, but recently she’s developed some new ones that I don’t know what to think about.

Do As I Say, Not As I Do

Most of her quirks I’ve grown to accept and let her have her way.

For example, yesterday she came down to the basement where she saw all of the dirty clothes I had dumped in the floor so I could sort them to be washed.

This on the basement floor = not OK. This in Tammy’s closet = OK.

She freaked out and couldn’t come upstairs until she had sorted them into the separate hamper compartments.

I tried to explain my logic but it always falls on deaf ears.

Tammy: I can’t stand when it’s like this. I don’t understand why you do this. Why don’t you put them in the hamper? That’s where they are sposed to go.

I just let her rant and head back upstairs shaking my head with a smirk on my face.

Me: She freaks out when she sees the clothes on the floor in the basement but doesn’t care if they are on the floor in her room.

Is That Even Possible?

But tonight while we were doing our eighth night of TurboFire (HIIT 20 & Stretch 20 for those scoring at home) Tammy did something I wasn’t used to seeing from her.

As our workout was winding down Chalene said we have to give “110% to get the results” then a few seconds later she said the workout is “short, but only works if you come with 110% intensity.”

That last statement didn’t sit well with Tammy.

Tammy: How can we gauge that? I mean really, how do you measure intensity?

She didn’t have a problem with the whole 110% being impossible thing. Instead she was trying to figure out the procedure she needs to follow in order to measure her intensity.

Give 100%. Anyone who asks you to give 110% doesn’t understand how math works.
— Someone on the internet

It made me laugh because I was the one who yelled at the TV when we did P90X a year or so ago.

I like Tony Horton. I really do. But it’d burn my ass when he’d go “check on the kids” while we did the exercises.

Then he’d jump in for the last 2-3 reps and act like he wasn’t tired. Of course you weren’t tired Tony!! You only did HALF of the workout we just did!!

A Visit From the Police

We headed upstairs and I started making dinner.

I threw some chicken sausage, shrimp and mushrooms in a skillet then added some pasta and it was all done in about 10 minutes.

Tammy came into the kitchen and started looking in the fridge. I saw she pulled out some asparagus I had cooked for our New Year’s Eve dinner.

Me: Oh yeah, I forgot about the spagaragus.
Tammy: (putting the container back) I don’t want that.
Me: Well I do.
Tammy: I thought it was the green beans. Where are they? We gotta have some “greens” on our plate.
Me: I’ve got some guacamole. Does that count?
Tammy: No. You need some real greens.

So now not only has Tammy become Mrs. Fitness by making me workout Sunday, but apparently she’s become a member of the Food Police as well.

TurboFire has been great at helping get me in shape but I’m starting to think it has created a monster.

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4 Responses to Not Sure About My Wife’s New Habits

  1. Dan says:

    Chicken sausage? Sounds really disturbing.

  2. So as a woman, I think I understand Tammy’s logic, except for in the second … I thought to the problem with 110% too. How can one give 110% when 100% is really the best you can go? This is like the 4.0 grade point average … in California, you can get up to 4.8 and 5.0 now, even though 4.0 is the max. Well then how can you gauge anything if you just shot your “best” in the foot with the concept of better-than-best-even-though-the-best-is-really-supposed-to-be-the-goal..

  3. I think I’m Tammy. That’s really weird. Am I Mrs. Cap’n Firepants dreaming I’m Tammy – or Tammy dreaming I’m Mrs. Cap’n Firepants? Because I swear she has my exact logic.

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