I’m not one to watch “award shows,” partially because most of the time I have no idea what movie, song or TV show is being presented, but I’ve recently gained a new respect for the people who win the awards.

Not because they are such good actors, actresses or singers, but because they are able to give an acceptance speech at the drop of a hat.

Yeah, yeah, I know they had plenty of time to get someone to write their speech because they knew ahead of time that they were nominated and had a chance to win.

But even still, even having the extra time I don’t know that I’d be able to write a good speech.

It’s a Learned Response 

That’s because I’m a slacker. More times than not I wait until the last minute, even when I have plenty of time to get things done.

I’m pretty sure I learned the bad habit from working in the newspaper industry during my early 20s where I was a Sports Copy Desk Editor at the Daily Journal in Tupelo.

I laid out the sports section every night and since sporting events usually end in the evening, I’d have a lot of stuff to do at the last minute in order to meet the press deadline.

* Not actually from the Daily Journal, but you get the idea.

She’s A Material Magnet

So, getting back to my point, it comes as no surprise that I’ve been dragging my feet on fulfilling my duties upon receiving another award from a fellow blogger.

Heather nominated me for the 7 x 7 Link Award (actual award below) and as my way of showing appreciation, I’m asking all of The Life of JWo fans that don’t know her already to head over and subscribe to her blog. And while you’re at it, don’t forget to “Like” her Facebook page.

I found Heather Christena Schmidt and her B(itch)log when she wrote about her experience at the Post Office that had me laughing and a little bit jealous because fun stuff like that never happens to me!

She seems to have the kind of warped view of the world that I find funny and so would most of you that know me. She’s witnessed what may have been a hostage situation and while in K-Mart (her first time in over 15 years) she overheard a couple’s rather odd names for their play things.

Fun times seem to follow her around because on the 4th she had more hilarity at the Circle K. We gotta start hanging out. haha…

Oh and I’m pretty sure Tammy would be a “regular” if Heather ever opens up the male version of Hooter’s she’s got in the works. My wife would be the female version of Norm, but I digress.

It’s Hard Work Being a Ho 

From what I saw on her site, she’s got posts that go back to March of 2010 and on December 29, 2011, she went over 9,000 all-time views.

Because of that I can definitively say that compared to her I’m a big whore (what a shock, huh?).

I’ve only been doing this since August and I just recently passed the 16,000 views mark because I’m always pimping out my site. But today… Heather I’m pimping out YOU!!

Enjoy the ride, the first one is free.

It’s My Award And I’ll Do What I Want To

I’m very honored to receive the 7 x 7 Link Award and will definitely add it to my Awards page.

But the original award, which no doubtingly has been passed from blogger to blogger for years, was starting to show its age. You can see the original award here.

It had gotten tattered and torn over the years and, while still a great honor, it was starting to look like it needed an Extreme Award Makeover.

So because I’m a bit of a nerd, dork, etc., and I’m pretty sure I’ve got some minor OCD issues, I felt the need to upgrade the award.

This way it will be able to forge into the new year and, hopefully, many years into the future. Plus, now it’s something I can gladly bestow on some of my fellow bloggers (keep reading).

The Pesky Fine Print

As with most of the blogger awards, there are requirements that must be met before the recipient can display the achievement, so here goes.

Something about me that my followers don’t know: This is the thing that was the most difficult for me to write because I’m a pretty open guy about the stuff that happens in my life (to a certain extend anyway).

But last night as Tammy and I were getting ready for our Friday night TurboFire workout, I caught myself doing something that I think was pretty weird. I told Tammy I was going to write about it and got a lukewarm response but you’re getting it anyway.

Before I workout, run, etc., I have to brush my teeth and put on Carmex. It HAS to be Carmex, not one of the cheap competitors.

I started doing that back in 2010 before I’d go out for a run. I can make sense of the needing the Carmex before running outside, but I don’t really know why I have to brush my teeth.

I also have to put Carmex on before I go to bed at night. Tammy says I have a Carmex addiction but what does she know.

Seven links of my blog posts that fit the following categories:

1. Most Surprisingly Successful: There have been several that have gotten a lot more views that I expected, but my first surprisingly successful post was when Tammy started crying because she had to drop Peyton Manning from her Fantasy Football team.
   But what really made this post one of my favorites was that Tammy got a new BFF in none other than ESPN’s Stephania Bell, who mentioned my post on Twitter and helped the post get 805 views that day.
2. Most Underrated: I wrote Babies, BBQ, Beer and Buhholes… in early August, long before I learned how to whore out my blog.
   The post covers a day where we babysat before heading to a friend’s BBQ for some beer. You’ll have to read it to see why the last “B” made the title.
   Trust me, it’s well worth it. If you don’t laugh then something may seriously be wrong with you.
3. Most Popular: From a pure numbers standpoint, Bully Tastes Southern-Fried Justice is in the top spot with over 1,900 total views. But those numbers are somewhat skewed with the nearly 900 hits it received over the past 7 days, nearly two months after it came out. All I know is that apparently there were a lot of people Googling “kick in the balls” last week.
4. Most Beautiful: On the third anniversary of my grandfather’s death I published Pop’s Promise: To Be a Man of His Word about him and his incredible commitment.
   Whether or not you agree with what he believed in, you have to respect that he made a promise and spent his entire life staying true to it.
5. Most Helpful: I have no doubt that my Forever Lazy post helped a lot of people, from those looking for something for the person who has everything to those on the receiving end of such an amazing gift.
   Tammy said she didn’t want one because it doesn’t come in leopard print. I don’t know if leopard and cheetah are the same to Grace because we all know what she thinks about cheetah prints.
6. Most Controversial: This one was easy. Without a doubt it had to be the last installment of Tammy’s Tirades. In Golf: The Mother of All Entitlements? she gave her opinion on guys getting to skip work to go play golf.
   Without going into details, I’ll just say that post ruffled a few feathers.
7. Most Pride Worthy: I’ve got a tie for this one, but they both involved me “coming out of the closet” and I can’t have one without the other.
   I released Nervously Coming Out of the Closet while Tammy was flying back from visiting her family in Florida.
   Coming Out of the Closet: The Reveal described what happened when we arrived home, complete with video footage of Tammy’s reaction to The Reveal.

Passing the 7 x 7 award along to seven bloggers I think my The Life of JWo followers should check out (in no particular order):

Six Ring Circus: I’ve mentioned this blog before, but there’s more to Annie than just what’s under the Big Top. She’s also an author of a blog called Health Bent Life to help people make better decisions about their health with recipes, fitness reviews and motivation for sticking with it. Definitely worth a look, especially for some of you Resolutioners out there.

When the Kids Go to Bed: This mother of three boys ages 6 and under has her hands full. But they can’t be THAT much trouble, look at how cute they are. Besides, any kid that can make a “butt-pincher” with Legos sounds like they don’t need much supervision anyway. But recently one of The Boys made her feel like she might be a little overbearing.

Young American Wisdom: I’ve mentioned her before because I love her constantly updating I Heard It on the Bus series, but that’s not all her kids are good for. They also are good for unknowingly insulting their mother, forgetting to brush their teeth for three days and giving their views on some of the famous people from history, here and here.

Muddled Mom: Another Mom blogging about the daily struggles with her family. Despite not knowing sports, she watched her son re-enact football plays and was embarrassed by her son when he realized what a “cup” was actually for. She’s even done something that I can’t do anymore and rode The Alpengeist over Thanksgiving.

LaFemmeRoar: She’s President of the Crazy Chicks Club (it’s not the “bad” crazy), as well as the Founding Mother of the Crazy Freaks Club where people can get their “freak” on. She was also nominated for Best Humor Blog by the Blogger’s Choice Awards.  But that’s not why she got an award from me. I’m sending her the 7 x 7 Link Award because she allowed me in her B.A.D Club. Yeah… who’s B.A.D bitches.

Inside Out and Backwards: You know anyone calling themselves Sister Merry Hellish is gonna be good and she doesn’t disappoint. She covers a variety of topics like being at work when the wire in her bra broke, listening to the Cleavage Police noisily eating oatmeal, to being harassed by a co-worker who thought she was married with children. She isn’t.

He Shat, She Shat: Ok, this one may not be for ALL of you. But for those of you that enjoy toilet humor (literally) this blog is right up your alley. Reading Material provided free of charge.

Also Well Worth the Click

I would have given the award to What I Meant 2 Say but she’s already received this award. You’ll have to look to find it on her crowded award shelf. She’s known as Wonderbutt’s Mom around our house. Wonderbutt is Savannah’s long-distance boyfriend she doesn’t know about yet.

Same goes for The Jackie Blog, except I don’t know if she’s actually got THIS award. I just know that after posting every day in 2011 (that’s 365 times for those that didn’t know) she’s taking a much needed break and a slower pace in 2012, but she’s still worth checking out. Oh, and Jackie, if you don’t have this award already consider it yours. You’ve more than earned it. You don’t even have to fulfill all of the requirements, at least not until the skin on your fingertips grows back and your replacement keyboard arrives.

In case you don’t want to click on all of the links, I’ve added all of the bloggers above, along with the others, under Blogs That Make Me Laugh along the right side of the page. Feel free to check them out.

I Know I’m Gonna Forget Someone

I’ve always loved writing, but I only did when I was mad, sad, depressed, etc., so it’s easy to see why writing had such a bad connotation. But after I read this post from The Bloggess,  I remembered that writing can be fun and started The Life of JWo.

A special thanks goes out to my friend B.J. for passing along the link from The Bloggess. B.J. was part of the publications department during my stint as Sports Editor at my college paper, the Flor-Ala and has seen me grow from a young punk who like to write to an older, slower punk who likes to write. Thank you B.J. Without you none of this would have happened. Well, prolly not anyway.

A big thank you also needs to go out to everyone that has helped make The Life of JWo fun for me.

I appreciate each and every one of you who follow me and for those of you who are going to subscribe after reading this. You can sign up in the box just under my toes at the top of the page.

It makes my innards feel good every time I see that one of you took the time to hit the “Like” button or leave a comment about one of my posts. You deserve the biggest THANK YOU of all.

Oh, and I guess I better thank my beautiful wife. Not many women would let me take pictures of them after a workout knowing that it’s going online for the world to see. Plus, she’s always a good source of material. I love you very much.

Whew… I guess now I can see why I put this off for so long. I’m glad it’s the weekend so I can recover.

Thanks again for the award Heather.