I usually take a little notebook and pen with me when I’m away from my computer and this past week was one of those times I was very glad I did.
This week there were #overheard gems at the bar as well as at the pool, which has recently been a hotbed of activity thanks to some of the people we have met.
Don’t forget that you can use the hashtag (#) in Facebook now, so start listening and start tagging.
Now here’s Part XII of Things I Have Overheard.
I somehow managed to get a sockline [tan] on Saturday. #overheard
If you get it too firm, it’s nasty. #overheard
I’ve never seen this before. #overheard
The only good wasp is one that’s dragging a dead spider. #overheard
The only thing I have going against me is my youth. People don’t expect people my age to be in charge. #overheard
Awww, come on, I don’t wanna see the box. #overheard
You look funny today because you’re hair’s not sticking up. #overheard
I’m a nerd for wrestling like [coworker] is for Magic and trolls. #overheard
I just realized that I am a troll. #overheard
I’m always so extreme. #overheard
Y’all are welcome to play with, what is this thing called? That thing. #overheard
If I wasn’t me, it would make it even harder. #overheard
CW 1: If I had my choice, which I don’t, I’d go to bed at 11.
CW 2: You don’t have a choice? Who does?
CW 1: My wife.
For some reason I really feel like the photo room smells like French Onion dip. #overheard
You can do it on the front, or you can do it on the back when they get bigger. #overheard
Everyone is afraid to beat their kids in public, but sometimes that’s where they need it the most. #overheard
Some kids need preemptive beatings. #overheard
I stopped it before it got to the mouth. #overheard
I so wanna chop somebody in the throat one day. #overheard
They were still in there and still making noise. #overheard
You eat all of that… In one sitting? #overheard
Pirate guy was here for a bit, talking bout titties and then when he left he said I looked sexy. Is it really a compliment when he only has one eye? #overheard
I know it’ll be hard for you to believe this, but I was actually pretty good the couple of times I played Dodgeball. #overheard
CW 1: I can’t believe how fast they got in there, it was like overnight.
Me: That’s not that fast. That’s like 8 hours. #overheard
It sucks that I got nothing. #overheard
The name of that movie makes me think of somebody licking a buhhole. #overheard
I think you played with this more than I did. #overheard
I enjoy sex more than drugs. #overheard
I literally get shivers just thinking about that thing. #overheard
They always do stupid sh!t. #overheard
You need funner weekends. #overheard
I never met a comic book nerd that didn’t like Chinese food. #overheard
Being good f^cks you. #overheard
He might have, maybe when he was younger, accidentally got laid. #overheard
That’s my new thing, to cook naked… until I clip a nipple then I’m gonna be mad. #overheard
If you had a third nipple that’s awesome. I’ve only seen that on the TV. #overheard
That’s what I need, a gaymance. #overheard
I don’t want no catfish hands jerking off me, I tell you that. #overheard
I thought he was gonna have a come-apart. #overheard
If you have a day where you have 10 minutes, you can squeeze on in. #overheard
If you want it, come grab it. #overheard
I don’t twat or Tweet or whatever it’s called. #overheard
All three of my girlfriends lost their virginity to my brother. #overheard
Every time he gets around you he gets all horny. #overheard
Kids are only good for a certain amount of time, then they get annoying. #overheard