It’s My Wife’s Fault That I’m Fat

OK, maybe that title isn’t entirely accurate. Sure, I’ve gained some weight since we arrived in Memphis, but I wouldn’t say I’m fat.

Also, it’s prolly not ALL Tammy’s fault, what with me eating my way through Memphis using my Food Bucket List as my guide.

BUT, my poor dinner selection Monday night was definitely Tammy’s fault.

Tammy had been out doing some Christmas shopping after work and called to say she was stopping at Wendy’s to pick up dinner.

Tammy: I’m gonna stop at Wendy’s, you want anything?
Me: Yeah… just the usual. Single with mayo, ketchup, tomato and onions. If you don’t do the onions, that’s OK.
Tammy: Got it and a large fry.
Me: That’s fine. We can split the fries if you want.

I continued about my business around the apartment, cleaning and what-not, when I get a text from Tammy.

Tammy: You got a double.

My initial thought was that maybe, just maybe Wendy’s screwed up my order, but that thought didn’t last very long because the next thing I knew Tammy was coming through the door.

Apparently this also comes in a double, as I learned from Tammy.

Me: Why did I get a double? I didn’t order a double.
Tammy: Because I wanted that new Bacon Portabella Melt and I got a double, so that means you had to have a double.

Of course I ate all of mine and was belly aching, figuratively and literally, afterwards.

Me: I can’t believe you got me a double and that I ate the whole thing.
Tammy: You know that’s the F’n rule! That if we eat out then we have to have the same fat content.

I’m going to have to remember that rule the next time we go out and she has a salad.

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7 Responses to It’s My Wife’s Fault That I’m Fat

  1. For real? That’s a rule? I’m going to remember that for when I get me a boyfriend!! lol

  2. Ha! That’s like. “You do want ice cream, don’t you?” you know, so that I can have ice cream. Actually, I never do that. I always eat ice cream whenever I want. I have to say that new hamburger does not appeal to me! It’s too complicated.

    • JWo says:

      She’d done it to me before, bring home a double instead of the single, but I never knew it was a “rule.”

      Tammy loves her some mushrooms on a burger and from the looks of what was left of it (nothing) she definitely enjoyed it!! HAHA…

  3. shoes says:

    I have to agree with Tammy on that rule! There is no way my husband is going to be nibbling on a salad while tuck away a double cheeseburger. Fair is fair in fat content when you are a couple. 🙂 Great post!

    • JWo says:

      I just wanted a single though!! hahaha…

      There have been plenty of times where she’s had a salad while I was woofing down some country fried steak or something.

      But that was BEFORE I knew about the rule… I have a feeling that she’ll pull out some by-law or something that says it doesn’t apply to whatever I’m eating at the time. o_O

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